The Cocktail Party (1949)
- It will do you no harm to find yourself ridiculous.
- Resign yourself to be the fool you are.
- You will find that you survive humiliation
- And that's an experience of incalculable value.
- That is the worst moment, when you feel you have lost
- The desires for all that was most dersirable,
- Before you are contented with what you can desire;
- Before you know what is left to be desired;
- And you go on wishing that you could desire
- What desire has left behind. But you cannot understand.
- How could you understand what it is to feel old?
- We die to each other daily.
- What we know of other people
- Is only our memory of the moments
- During which we knew them. And they have changed since then.
- To pretend that they and we are the same
- Is a useful and convenient social convention
- Which must sometimes broken. We must also remember
- That at every meeting we are meeting a stranger.
- What is hell? Hell is oneself.
- Hell is alone, the other figures in it
- Merely projections. There is nothing to escape from
- And nothing to escape to. One is always alone.
- Half the harm that is done in this world
- Is due to people who want to feel important.
- They don't mean to do harm — but the harm does not interest them.
- Or they do not see it, or they justify it
- Because they are absorbed in the endless struggle
- To think well of themselves.
- There are several symptoms
- Which must occur together, and to a marked degree,
- To qualify a patient for my sanitorium:
- And one of them is an honest mind. That is one of the causes of their suffering.
- To men of a certain type
- The suspicion that they are incapable of loving
- Is as disturbing to their self-esteem
- As, in cruder men, the fear of impotence.
- I should really like to think there's something wrong with me —
- Because, if there isn't then there's something wrong,
- Or at least, very different from what it seemed to be,
- With the world itself — and that's much more frightening!
- Everyone's alone — or so it seems to me.
- They make noises, and think they are talking to each other;
- They make faces, and think they understand each other.
- And I'm sure they don't. Is that a delusion?
- Can we only love
- Something created in our own imaginations?
- Are we all in fact unloving and unloveable?
- Then one is alone, and if one is alone
- Then lover and beloved are equally unreal
- And the dreamer is no more real than his dreams.
- I shall be left with the inconsolable memory
- Of the treasure I went into the forest to find
- And never found, and which was not there
- And is perhaps not anywhere? But if not anywhere
- Why do I feel guilty at not having found it?
- Disillusion can become itself an illusion
- If we rest in it.
- Two people who know they do not understand each other,
- Breeding children whom they do not understand
- And who will never understand them.
- There is another way, if you have the courage.
- The first I could describe in familiar terms
- Because you have seen it, as we all have seen it,
- Illustrated, more or less, in lives of those about us.
- The second is unknown, and so requires faith —
- The kind of faith that issues from despair.
- The destination cannot be described;
- You will know very little until you get there;
- You will journey blind. But the way leads towards possession
- Of what you have sought for in the wrong place.
- We must always take risks. That is our destiny.
- If we all were judged according to the consequences
- Of all our words and deeds, beyond the intention
- And beyond our limited understanding
- Of ourselves and others, we should all be condemned.
- Only by acceptance of the past will you alter its meaning.
- Every moment is a fresh beginning.
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